Saturday, October 2, 2010

Beer, Chips and Chorizo: A simple meal with complex conversation

      "What would your magnum opus be and how would it inspire people?" asks Janel.  Now this is a heavy question, how would my life's work be a window for people to change and experience life differently?   Honestly I am not sure at this point what my magnum opus will be, I am so young with so many dreams.  I guess you won't know what it is until the end of your days but even then I presume you will still be building on it.  Needless to say I decided to root my answer in what is important to me now and will continue to be in the future.  I said I would like for people to always remember how important family relationships are.  So many times I hear "I haven't talked to my brother for 30 years" or "my mom and I hate eachother, we just don't get along" and it just kills me that people have reached that point, that realization that it's just not worth it.  I know what I am proposing is not easy and at times feels like a hopeless endeavor, but there is usually light at the end of the tunnel.  Sometimes that light takes longer to grow and shine but it does exist.  I know from experience.
        This conversation resonated with me and prompted me to ponder other intimate facets of myself.  To think about this blog and the way I portray myself to my audience.  I realized that it's pretty dry and without much real emotion.  I write about the food but in such a general way that I don't even leave hungry for what I have just spent 2 hours explaining.  Sitting in the bar, I understood that in academia or as an academic writer, you are trained to take ourselves out of whatever we are writing about.  As such, the writing becomes about the subject of study.  Now all of the sudden I am expected to put myself forth and let my personality shine through.  Granted I have purposely put myself in this position but I made this blog to expand myself and share my passion with others.  I need to include those things that are deep within me, my thoughts, my feelings, my emotions, my opinions, and through that expression, I believe that the great passion within me will explode onto the page.  I am grateful to have friends here that ask probing questions that put me outside of my comfort zone and make me take a hard look at who I am in this space.  I am a women in Spain, I am a Brazilian-American in Spain, I am a Fulbright Grantee in Spain, I am an anthropologist in Spain, I am a foodie in Spain.  All of these parts of myself are cogs in a large bodily clock constantly working together to shape my experience in Spain and in turn how I translate those experiences onto the page.  This is an honest post about an honest realization.

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